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Archive for the ‘Comedy’ Category

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 Help save the pandas.

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Some of these are just ridiculous, the most expensive one is even worth as much as a small Japanese car…

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$1,000 dollar sundae

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List of the best pick up lines for nerds ever. Screech would be proud.

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1. Babies are dropped off by a stork with a hat.

Come on now, we all know that babies are made in a factory. The stork idea is simply bogus.

2. Sneezing with your eyes open makes them fall out.

This would always scare the hell out of me. For the longest time I feared my eyes would hang out and I would go blind if I didn’t cover my eyes. What a mean little trick, considering It’s practically impossible to sneeze without closing your eyes.

3. If you cross your eyes long enough they will stay that way.

I used to love crossing my eyes, and who doesn’t? It is funny and looks weird, but everyone knowledgable knows your eyes won’t “stick” that way. The body is an amazing wonder.

4. There is a pot of gold and a leprechaun at the other end of the rainbow.

Rainbows, rain’s little present afterwards. Oh how I wish a pot of gold rested at the other end, and a leprechaun named Patrick. One day I thought  I would find one and be rich.

5. Every time you curse, an angel loses its wings.

Alright, everyone knows angels can’t lose their wings anyway because they are super glued on. This one makes me sick.

6. If you send Santa a letter he will write back.

I had hopes every Christmas that Santa would hear my call, until I got a letter back in my Grandma’s handwriting.

7. If you sit that close to the TV you will go blind.

Who wants to sit far away from the TV? This little lie bugged the crap out of me, I just wanted to have a good view of Looney Tunes, sheesh.

8. It’s ok, tell me the truth and I promise you won’t get  in trouble.

Haha, maybe the mother of all fake claims. Nearly every child hears this at some point, only to be punished severly after spilling the beans.

9. This is going to hurt me more than it’s going to hurt you.

What a load of rubbish.

10. Don’t be sad, Skippy is just taking a REALLY long nap.

If he is taking a nap, why has he stopped breathing? And why is some strange man in a coat putting him in a plastic bag? Mom, save him!

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         The dramatic prairie dog video has taken the internet by storm, with millions upon millions of views to its name on YouTube. The cult of the dramatic rodent has lead to t-shirts, key chains, and a myriad of other rodent related items. As with any other internet famed video, numerous spinoffs has formed as a result. Some intriguing, some hilarious, others just plain weird. In any event, it seems that the creativity will never end as long as the prairie dog rules the net. Here I invite you to enjoy these wholly entertaining, alternate versions of one of the internet’s latest sensations.

The original dramatic prairie dog.

Kill Bill style.

Kill Bill style version 2.

James Bond edition.

Dr. Evil remake.

Dr. Evil version 2. 

Curses! foiled again.

And the Oscar goes to…

Prairie Dog drug bust.

Caught in the act.

My personal favorite: unedited edition.

Oh rly? Yeah rly.

Caught red-handed.

Someone in this room… 

Star Wars remix.

Drugged out version.

The Shining recut.

300  recut.

Dick Cheney remix.

Watcha talkin bout Willis?

Katana slip remix.

80’s remix.

Busted for pirating.

Dramtatic prairie dog meets the Titanic.

Darth Vader remix.

Zoolander edition.

Terminator edition.

Hitler a la prairie dog.

Anime theme show edition.

Guitar hero star remix.

Triumph the Insult Comic Dog homage.

Could it be Satan?!

Chipmunkzilla unleashing destruction!

Blame the prairie dog.

I’m Batman.

Now even he’s got an iphone.

 

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           If you take a trip over to Scotland, you may come across Sam, the world’s first shoplifting bird. That’s right, Sam has a knack for the five finger (or one beak) discount, as is evident through compelling security camera footage of Sam in action. He stands between 8 to 11 inches, depending on which store he is exiting. His tactics are simple, he walks in casually, snaps up a bag of chips, and prompty makes his escape. The chips are always conspicuously the same: cheese Doritos. The tiny thief has quickly taken the Scottish community by storm, and apparently onlookers have even been reinbursing the store owner for the merchandise. Who knows when and where he may strike again. Be on the look out for Sam the shoplifting seagull.

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